take
take
take me all apart.
i don't
know how
to live.
where do I even start?
when my heart
is there
and my head
everywhere
and my feet
and my hands
are reaching for somewhere
other than here
to be present
in life
to show up
without disguise
what will it cost
to step outside my head
to open my eyes
to take hard steps
and make decisions mine?
those will be angry
and call me cruelty
she's changed! she's crazy!
How could this be?
They won't understand
the life I just accepted
and let be
let be
let be
let be
that slowly I let "be" turn into me
but it wasn't
I was just letting it be
sinking beneath
the raging sea
to raise no issues or disagree
letting waves wash over me
and sink me too deep
until I couldn't see
which part was the water,
and which part was me
because staying problem-free
was much more easy
than standing up
for what I believe.
until it made me rather die
than to exist at all
until I cried every night
and my voice grew raw
until I crawled on my knees
to my God in awe
and praised his name
and begged his mercy
to catch me before I would fall
until this was the sum of my life
did I realized the weight of my daily strife
it is dignity and the realization
of the sacrifice
that makes me appreciate
the brave ones who seek to stay nice
to raise no issues
with the way they are ignored
who claim to be okay
and spend life floored
by a belief
that they matter not one bit
to hide what they want
for fear of being hit
by fear and discord,
by sarcasm and wit,
directed only to tear them down
and make them prefer to quit
I seek strength
to speak my truth,
but to learn it first
for who am I? i do not know it. Do you?
through righteous principals
I don't leave those behind
the are my only real true guide
because this life is a maze
my outlook such a haze
unless I look up to creation
where I am always amazed
It has never failed
I am no longer jailed
but free, and me
and its the most comfortable feeling
of letting go, of letting be...
of just remembering how to breath
My God does this
oh he does this
for me.
Where else
could I possibly
be?
I would not be here
at all.
There. would. be.
no. me.
-aq/lesnspired
